One Kiss Before We Say Good-bye
by traumschwinge
Summary: After the death of Spain's Charles derich and Antonio meet for the last time as a married couple. Warning for break-up feels.


"So, this is it?" Roderich asked slowly. They were standing in the garden of Antonio's house in Madrid. He looked up to the despite the dire hour bright sky. His left hand played absentmindedly with the golden band around the forth finger of his right hand. He had never paid this little piece of jewelry much attention.

Antonio nodded. There were no words left to say between them. They both had know this from the start, that every alliance, no matter how strong, would eventually wither and decline until it wasn't even worth remembering anymore. Despite himself, Antonio wasn't smiling on that day. He had already been wearing his mourning band and garments fitting the occasion. The death of the last king connecting the two of them had been conceivable for months.

Silence wrapped itself around the two of them, trying to force them to take its bait and blurt out something, anything they never came around telling each other while there had still been time.

After a long while, Roderich sighed. "Is it true what they say?" he asked a lonely cloud up in the skies, pushing a stray strand of hair back as he raised his glance. "Will you ally yourself with France?" He bit his lips, sealing them shut so they wouldn't spill the words he didn't want to be said.

Antonio nodded grimly. "My late king asked me to," he said. His voice wasn't shaking for which Roderich silently gave him credits. It had been good as long as it had lasted after all. "So I will defend his last will against everyone who thinks he could just ignore that." He sighed. "We both know, that this includes you."

Again, they let the silence linger between them, let it tease them to speak their heart. After all,it had been a long time in which they had known the other would always be there, no matter what. Never, not even once had they have a proper talk about everything they would have needed to voice. They had still been so young. Now, with every passing second, it became more apparent that they had missed their time.

"I trust Lovino will still be well within your care," Roderich murmured when he couldn't take the silence any more. He couldn't ask Antonio to stay with him anymore. He knew he was just afraid of being alone, even though he knew he wasn't alone. He should have asked him to stay years ago. Should have, could have, would have. It was all too late now.

Antonio laughed, but it wasn't his usual clear and cheerful laughter. It was a means to an end, like everything in their life so far. It only eased the tension away for as long as it lasted. "As Feliciano will within yours," Antonio said.

This time, they didn't wait as long as before. In the end, there was even more silence between them in the long years when they had been together. Silence had always been what connected them, wrapped tight around their chest, sometimes soothing, but much too often only suffocating.

Gently, Antonio touched Roderich's hand.

The brief touch didn't even last a heartbeat, but when Roderich didn't pulled his hand away, Antonio hooked their pinkies together. They stood like this for a while, watching clouds and birds pass over them, aware of the time they had been.

With a sigh marking his surrender, Roderich rested his head gently against Antonio's upper arm. There was no telling when they would ever meet again like this. From what it looked like now, never, but times could change, eventually. In the end, change was inevitable as life itself.

It took them a while to get here, they both realized as much. It didn't come easy to either of them, both of them with their own, little ways of avoiding emotional involvement. No matter what they pretended, when it all came down to the heart, they had always been involved.

"You will be alright on your own?" Antonio asked, pulling Roderich into a last embrace. He had never been good with words, not when it came to the important things. He had always liked to hide all his fondness for the people special to him behind his oh so cheerful facade.

Roderich's fingers curled themselves around the fabric of Antonio's shirt, pulling him close. He had his eyes shut, his forehead resting against his husband's … former husband's shoulder. A gentle, warm hand patted the back of his head softly. "Of course, I will, you fool," he whispered.

Antonio simply nodded. He was used to this, so often had he heard words like this that he couldn't imagine never hearing them again. They wished in vein for the other to find the strength to hold both of them closer.

As Roderich finally pulled away, his fingers uncurling so his hands rested flat against Antonio's chest, he turned his head. For a second, their lips brushed. Green met violet. Then, their lips found each other again, crushing together hard and full of need and unspoken desires. It didn't take them long.

The short moment lost of all restraint ended. Out of breath and red-lipped, they looked at each other again for a split second. Quickly not to reveal any of the remorse and hurt lingering in their eyes, they turned their heads away.

"Farewell, my dear, my love."

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**A/N****:** This ff is set in 1700, around November 1st when Charles II of Spain died and with him the Spanish line of the Habsburg. The alliance between France and Spain mentioned is actually a reference to the War of Spanish Succession, which started the following year.

Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed this! Leave a comment if you want and feel free to add it to you favorites. If you spotted any mistake, let me know. I don't really have a beta so every mistake is entirely my own fault.


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